As we continue to explore important topics to discuss during premarital counseling, think about your biggest fears, concerns, and struggles are with your current relationship. Addressing these issues early on will create a solid foundation for your marriage that will ultimately keep your relationship strong.
Many couples choose to have children after they get married, but that is not always the case. You will need to discuss this with your future spouse in advance to make sure you have the same family goals. Even if you already have children (as a couple or separately), you need to decide if you want to have more kids in the future. You can always change your mind, but this gives you a good starting point to build from.
- Do we want to have children in the future?
- How long will we wait to have kids?
- How many children would we like to have?
- How will children impact our careers? Example: Someone may stop working to take care of the children
- What core values will we instill in our children?
- If we cannot have children of our own, do we plan to adopt or pursue fertility treatments?
- If we do not want children, what will we do to prevent pregnancy? Example: Birth control, abstinence, preventative medical procedures, etc.
Note: Perspectives Of Troy offers blended family counseling services for couples with children from past relationships. Contact us at (248) 244-8644 to learn more.
Your family planning shouldn’t stop at the discussion of children. You also need to talk about how your relationships will work with your existing families. Of course, this is easier to manage if you both get along with each other’s families and if your families get along with one another. If there are complications with your future in-laws though, you may want to go through family counseling to work out your issues before your big day.
- How often will we visit our families?
- How will we split up our time during the holidays?
- How can we resolve current issues with our families?
- Do we plan to take family vacations? (In this case, we are referring to vacations with extended family members, not your children)
- What can we do to minimize fighting between our families?
- Are there any unspoken issues we have with each other’s families?