In our comprehensive guide to premarital counseling, we have been looking over important issues to talk about during your counseling sessions. So far, we have explored subjects related to finances, family, conflict resolution, and personal values. In this part of the guide, we will explore even more conversation points you can use in your premarital counseling appointments.
Romance And Intimacy
Intimacy is a difficult topic for some couples to discuss, especially if they are not sexually active prior to getting married. That’s why we grouped “romance” into this section because you may have issues with the way that element of your relationship works. If one of you is more “experienced” than the other with regards to intimacy and romance, you may want to get your concerns, insecurities, and frustrations out before they turn into big fights later on. Our open-minded marriage counselors will help you through what may feel like an embarrassing conversation and help you reach a resolution point.
Discussion Starters
- Is there enough romance in our current relationship?
- What can we do to keep the romance alive?
- Are we happy with the amount of intimacy we have in our relationship, or do we want more after we get married?
- Do we connect well on an intimate level? NOTE: This could just mean kissing, holding hands, going out on dates, etc.
- What concerns do we have about each other’s previous relationships?
Social Interactions
You may have longstanding friendships that have been around much longer than your relationship with your fiancé. In that case, you need to make sure that your social life and your marital life balance each other out. If you have mutual friends, you should discuss how you will interact with them once you are married – especially in the case of friends of the opposite sex.
Don’t forget about your online interactions as well! See Is Social Media Ruining Your Marriage? to learn more.
Discussion Topics
- How often will we spend time with our friends separately?
- How often will we spend time with friends as a couple?
- What do we do if we don’t like each other’s friends?
- How can we divide up “us time” and “their time”?
- Should we make new friends as a couple? If so, how?
- Are there any friends in our lives that may be a bad influence on our marriage?